Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

ADL Blog Images - 2022-11-11T145346.974

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Lindsay F Babich

Ahhh, the self-critic! Thank you for reminding all of us about the "Shouldas."  Erma Bombeck wrote an article that has remained fresh in my mind. She was asked what she would do differently if she had her life to live over. At first she said, "Nothing." Then, after some thought, she changed her mind and wrote what I think is her most memorable piece. Two of the items - do overs - on the list were:

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.

I would have eaten popcorn in the "good" living room and worried less about the dirt when you lit the fireplace.

This "I could have company over IF ONLY..." is the most paralyzing trope because it serves to block community, action, and enjoyment and it is the unwritten, mostly unspoken, deep-seated (seeded) I AM NOT WORTHY trap. How many of us are in that vise daily turning the screws ourselves?

ADL has been amazingly supportive in managing these human symptoms. By using our "practice" of the ever-present question, "Is this for the Highest Good of ALL?" we literally cannot avoid including ourselves in the ALL. Holding the HIGHEST DEGREE OF LOVE for ALL is not a belief system, it is a practice and applied daily with clear intent is our constant snap-back to SELF-LOVE. Now, IF ONLY I had known this 50 years ago...😎

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